Friday, June 12, 2009

Excuse Note & Slapshot Analysis of Game 7



Dear America:

Please excuse Western Pennsylvania and the entire State of Michigan as we proudly sing "O, Canada" and drop the puck on Game 7 of the Stanley Cup Playoffs.

The Management



P.S.: GO WINGS!

First Period Summary:

NBC Announcers:

"Crosby!"
"Crosby!"
"Crosby!"
"Crosby!"
"Crosby!"
"Crosby!"
"Crosby!"
"Crosby!"
"Crosby!"

Score at end of First Period:

0-0

REEBOK Ad:

"Crosby!"

EXPERT ANALYSIS:

Guys, we let Pittsburgh have the puck too freakin' often and for too freakin' long on our side of the ice, eh?

Second Period Summary:

Max Talbot from Pittsburgh scores two goals.

Liam:

"Oh-oh! Daddy said the F-word!"

NBC Announcers:

"Crosby is hurt!"
"Crosby is hurt!"
"Crosby is hurt!"
"Crosby is hurt!"
"Crosby is hurt!"
"Crosby is hurt!"
"Crosby is hurt!"

PHOTOGRAPHIC PROOF:



Crosby, hurt.

EXPERT ANALYSIS:

Guys, we'll never win the freakin' Cup unless we get the freakin' puck down on Pittsburgh's side of the freakin' ice, eh?

INTERMSSION:

NBC ANNOUNCER, TALKING TO MAX TALBOT:


"Eh, are you imitating Sidney Crosby out there?"

Talbot: "Huh?"

Question:

Do the NBC Announcers get a Canadian Looney every time they mention Sidney Cosby?

Third Period Summary:

GO WINGS!

Uhm, NOW!

Oh, oh.

The Cup is out of the box and they are polishing it. Pittsburgh still leads, 2-0.

YES! Ericsson Scores!

2-1 Penguins!

The Wings pull goalie Chris Osgood from the net.

The seconds tick down.

CWAP!

We lose.

And Crosby is still hurt!

EXPERT ANALYSIS:

We didn't put the freakin' puck in Pittsburgh's freakin' net often enough, eh?

Jack Ridl (a total Pittsburgh guy) will never let me live this one down.

NBC Announcers:

"Sidney Crosby, so, uh, you're still hurt, eh?"


1 Comments:

Blogger Susan Och said...

I think hockey is losing fans because the announcers only know how to tell one story. They pick one team member and elevate him to the hero status and then tell the whole story from his point of view. The Red Wings fans are certainly tired of the routine.

12:48 PM  

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